Rapport is that state where you connect, know, and trust somebody. You’ve probably had times when you’ve clicked with people, you’ve instantly hit it off and you get on, yes? You’ve probably also had times where you’ve talked to somebody and it’s just not happening – you think "who is this Martian?" And you just can’t relate to this person at all, right?
Rapport is a
skill, and it’s the ability to create that connection with a complete stranger
anytime you want to. And the nice thing
about it is, it’s not some kind of fluffy philosophy or technique or
willy-nilly idea, it actually genuinely is a series of things that you can do,
and you can tell when it’s working cos you get direct signals – you get signs
that come back that are quantifiable and instantly visible and feel-able, from
the person you’re getting rapport with, or the people you’re getting rapport
with. It works just as well in groups as it does face to face with one individual.
Which tells you
whether or not you’re getting on, which means you can tell if it’s
working. Now there’s an old quote that
says everything in life you want is either owned by someone else or you’re
going to need someone’s help to get it, so you’d better be good at building
rapport. It’s a fundamental skill. Especially if you’re going to be doing
therapy, coaching or consulting, because they’re only going to tell you their
deepest, darkest fears if they know you, like you and trust you.
If you’re going to be using NLP & HGE™ for
marketing and sales, then people will only do business with you cos they know
you, like you and trust you. If you’re
going to be teaching or presenting, then you want your audience to know you,
like you and trust you. And quite
frankly, as a teacher or trainer or educator, it’s much nicer to be standing in
front of an audience who like you rather than an audience who don’t. And you may know how that feels.
In essence,
Rapport skills are one of the fundamental skills that we teach on a training course
because we firmly believe that if you have rapport, it makes your life a hell
of a lot more pleasant and easier. Which
is the bottom line with all this stuff – the bottom line with NLP & HGE™ is that it
lets you get more of the results you want in life more often, in more easier
ways…
OH and by the way, this is NOTHING to do with "make more eye contact" or "smile more". Please!
As a trainer or speaker, if you're going to stand in front of a group of people, you better have rapport with them or they will tear you to shreds. At the least it will be uncomfortable for everyone. Awkward silences, no engagement, jokes fall flat and the students can't wait for it to be over. And trust me if you're in front of a group like that and you're not hitting it off, it feels horrible. Trust me, I've been there!
As a Financial Adviser I used to have to do a fact-find, then go away and prepare a proposal, then come back and try and get the sale. After I learned about Rapport, my appointments halved and my sales doubled. When my manager asked me what I was doing, it led to my first proper paid training gig.
As a Master Hypnotherapist I had to be able to create a "sacred space" where my new client would feel safe and trusting enough to tell me their deepest, darkest fears and concerns. That's ESSENTIAL in helping professional context. Some people are just people people who click with anyone. I had to learn how to do that.
When I did my Coaching training over 3 years back in 2001, they didn't cover Rapport anywhere! If you're going to be that client's secret weapon and confidant, cajoling them, questioning them, holding them accoubnatble and walking with them as they reach their goals, YOU MUST HAVE RAPPORT. many a coaching client is lost on the initial phone call or the first meeting because there's no rapport.
OK so have I hammered this point home yet? No rapport, no coaching. No rapport, no checky :-)
If you'd like to learn how do do this stuff, come and join me on Nov 10/11th - click here for details
